The first thing I thought when I saw some of these photos, was “man, I look tired”. And the truth is…I am tired. Mothering three young children and running a business takes every ounce I’m willing to give to it. 

I owned Sunday Supply for 5 years before I started having kids. Now 4.5 years into motherhood, I’m still learning daily to hold my plans, my expectations, my work loosely. Where my attention on my career was once easily focused and protected, it’s now very much divided. In the division of my roles and my new identity as a mom, a sense of ‘wholeness’ has started to develop. Not easily, at first. I wouldn’t say this has been a welcomed change. Was I working enough? Was I giving my kids what they needed? Was I learning and adapting as a business owner and mother? Was there even space for both? For a long time I tried to just push forward, but none of my old tricks worked. I couldn’t do it all, and I failed miserably trying. I was always behind and truthfully, overwhelmed.

Embracing the reality of the daily uncertainty, while uncomfy at first, has felt like the greatest gift. It’s taught me to be present and gracious and more whole. On my daily to-do list of 10 things, I may get to 3 of them. Maybe just 1. And that’s enough. When we shuffle out the door a littler late, or a sick kiddo unexpectedly needs to be picked up early, I’m learning to see the beauty and gift in what feels like an interruption to my plans. I don’t think I’ll look back on my life when my kids are grown and wish my house had been picked up more or that I had entered more online inventory. I know I will miss this season. I’ll miss this season of the shop- of rounding the corner on 10 years of business and feeling more than ever like I have no idea what I’m doing. In a way, it’s been a lot like parenting. Suddenly the business has made it into the middle-school years and it’s a whole new learning curve, and a bit awkward.

As a mother and business owner, the juggle is real, but I can feel the balls getting lighter in my hands. As I've embraced the unknown, it's somehow become easier, lighter and more joyful. What's my key? GRACE. Grace for myself, for my team, for my family. Grace to know that when the only thing I've done that day is make it through, that's enough. The to-do list will always be there. I'll keep the important things at the top. The rest can wait. I've surrendered to the feeling of being behind to the point that it no longer feels like the goal to catch up. 

Being present and doing my best, no matter what it looks like on a given day is enough. So yes, I wish I didn't look quite as tired some days (read most days), but I feel proud of why I'm tired. I know these roles will take every ounce I'm willing to give, and I'm learning to give myself to the right things. The overlap of mothering and business ownership often feels like a messy middle that sometimes I just want to clean up, but the beauty really is in the blurred lines. Prepared or not, showered or not, put together or not, it's enough. 

  XO, Amanda